Kind of an update and kind of disgusting

So, I went to the doctor on Monday.  She checked me out and stated that I was probably dehydrated, throwing my whole system out of whack.  She prescribed a medication to help with the nausea, and informed me that I needed to drink a lot of liquids that day--2 liters worth!!!!!!!  It was already almost 2 pm, so I couldn't imagine doing it.  Especially since I could only drink your standard liquids for a stomach bug--7-up, chicken broth, gatorade, jello.  All of which I hate.  :( 

Then she sent me over to the lab for bloodwork and then sent me home to collect, ahem, other samples.  That was disgusting.  I am still waiting for results--she said the bloodwork should be back in a day and the other samples would take a while, depending on what specific test.  I finally called on Friday afternoon, but the receptionist said the bloodwork results were in but she didn't know why the doctor hadn't done something, it wasn't clear to me, but obviously they weren't ready for me know.  Sorry for the massive run-on sentence.  Anyway, I hope to hear something Monday.

However, even just drinking liquids, my stomach was SOOOO upset.  And my head was killing me.  By Monday night, I was incredibly hungry and my stomach was not rumbly, it was making scary noises!  I called Tuesday morning and she said to stay on the liquids for another day.  Once again, I was ravenous, but oddly enough, my stomach wasn't making noises by that point.  By Tuesday night though, I wasn't really wanting to eat anymore.  I did think that I was going to pass out--I was so weak and out of it, that I literally stumbled to bed wondering if I was going to die!  Wednesday, I got to start the lovely BRAT diet--again,  I truly dislilke two of those things.  I ate 6 pieces of toast that day and actually choked down half a banana.  I hate bananas so much, my mom couldn't believe me when I told her I ate part of one! 

So, I am slowly trying to eat again and see what settles okay.  Things still aren't right, but they seem a little better.  I am still having my headaches, but she has me on two new meds for that--gabapentin and riboflavin of all things.  I am also trying to stay hydrated, so hopefully I never have to drink 2 liters of liquid in half of a day!  Blech!  We will see what happens next week!

Scared

So, it's been a long time, as usual.  I wish I had a good excuse, but I don't.  Just life--being busy with the girls and trying to keep them from driving me crazy this summer.

However, something is going on with me and I need to put it down on paper...err, just get it out of my head.  I have felt like crap for the last 8-9 days--horrible headaches and stomach pain/diarrhea.  Now, I am a sickly girl--always have been.  I have migraines, so the headaches didn't seem that unusual.  I also have irritable bowel (sorry if that's TMI), so the stomach thing wasn't surprising either.  But the length and severity of both, combined right now, are scaring me.  I've taken my meds for both and neither are working well. 

Needless to say, being this sick has made me a little depressed.  It's difficult to function--I was sick to my stomach while taking Kelly to school, and I can't be far away from a bathroom, so I can't run my errands.  Not to mention, my headache makes me dizzy and I don't trust myself to drive. 

But Friday morning, I started to wonder if there is some underlying problem--brain tumor?  Stomach cancer?  Are they both symptoms of something horrible?  As much as I didn't want to, I called and made an appointment for the doctor on Monday.  I'm hoping she will send me for an MRI or CAT scan so I can either know or rule out this scary possibility.

And going down this road, at least mentally, has me thinking about what I would miss with my girls and that, in turn, is making me emotional.  I have felt stuck in a rut the last few years, but still don't know what I want to be "when I grow up".  The idea that this is it, and I may not get a chance to see my kids grow up or ultimately make a difference in the world, is terrifying.